Lessons from the week (20 Aug 2023)

on lending money, negotiating and sales

Lessons on lending money

During the pandemic I gave out a loan to someone I did not want to lend to. I should have listened to my instinct. I am now having to go to court to recover what is owed. The lessons I have learnt from this experience is to: 
(1) Not lend money as a rule. And if you are lending money, do so with the expectation that it may never come back.
(2) Money is emotional. The sleepless nights and the anger and frustration that I felt is hard to quantify.

Lessons on negotiating

I went back to some of the notes from the book Never Split the Difference in order to speak with the defaulter of the loan I mentioned above. Here they are:

• Negotiating serves two distinct, vital life functions - information gathering and behavior influencing.

• Instead of prioritizing your argument - in fact, instead of doing any thinking at all in the early going about what you're going to say - make your sole and encompassing focus the other person and what they have to say.

• The goal is to identify what your counterparts actually need (monetarily, emotionally, or otherwise) and get them feeling safe enough to talk and talk and talk some more about what they want.

• The key here is to relax and smile while you’re talking. A smile, even while talking on the phone, has an impact tonally that the other person will pick up on.

• It’s almost laughably simple: for the FBI, a “mirror” is when you repeat the last three words (or the critical one to three words) of what someone has just said.
  
  By repeating back what people say, you trigger this mirroring instinct and your counterpart will inevitably elaborate on what was just said and sustain the process of connecting.

• It’s just four simple steps: Use the late-night FM DJ voice. Start with “I’m sorry …” Mirror. Silence. At least four seconds, to let the mirror work its magic on your counterpart. Repeat.
  
  Example - Popping his head into her office, the boss said, “Let’s make two copies of all the paperwork.” “I’m sorry, two copies?” she mirrored in response, remembering not only the DJ voice, but to deliver the mirror in an inquisitive tone. The intention behind most mirrors should be “Please, help me understand.”
  
  Every time you mirror someone, they will reword what they’ve said. They will never say it exactly the same way they said it the first time.

Lessons on sales

I revisited notes from the book $100 million offers to get ideas on how to do better in my businesses. Here are some of the notes from it:

• The pain is the pitch.

• Sell based on value not price.

• If everyone is equal then the cheapest is the most valuable.

• Increase price by offering 10x more value for that price. Make the difference massive.

• People are always looking for deals - to get more for what they are paying.

• Charging higher prices heightens perceived value. People want to buy expensive things. They just need a reason. 

• To charge a premium you need a big gap between what something costs you, and what you charge for it.

• Those who pay the most, pay the most attention.

• You want them to think "I get all this for just that?"

• The sweet spot is to sell something very well that is also easy to fulfil.

• The offer should:

  • solve all the perceived problems

  • be one of a kind

  • make it impossible to compare you

Harsh Batra
LinkedIn

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